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Saturday, December 03, 2005

"Where are we in relation to Europe? Not far from Dover"

If football has a Queen of the South, her King is surely Harry Redknapp. Again he'll be toddling along the bottom coast, back to Pompey this time once terms are agreed. Will his presence be enough to turn Portsmouth around?

TDH doubts it. The man with Droopy Dog's jowls is competent - of that there can be no doubt - but Portsmouth simply don't have the squad to finish any higher than 18th. After all, three of their top players came from, ahem, Tyneside....


And speaking of that foggy river bank, Souey seems to believe that heeding TDH's advice could save his job. There on the starting line-up card was Chopra's name, though puzzlingly placed alongside Shearer and Ameobi. Heaven forfend that the lad should be allowed to play with the usual complement of midfielders providing service.

Give Souey some lemonade, and somehow, goshdangit, he'll make lemons. Latest lemon: dropping two points at home - at least it's not three this time - to another team below us.


Arjen Robben is simply the best left-winger in the world. The Man Who Would Be England Manager put three defenders on the Supersonic Dutchman (yes, he's faster than this cute little guy), and Robben ate them for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Repeatedly. He must be bursting.

Robben is quick, sure. But his true gift is how he reads other players. His anticipation can only be appreciated in slow motion. As soon as poor Matthew Bates's pupils shifted one nanometer to the right, poof, there went the ball looping over his left shoulder, with Robben in hot pursuit.


Of course, TDH could not let the day pass without noting that the Empire State Building has finally scored for the Kop. Apparently it was quite a sweet little touch. Well, TDH has one phrase for you, loyal readers: a million monkeys. For a quasi-scholarly exigesis on this topic, please look here.


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