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Monday, April 10, 2006

"If you don't want to know the results, close your ears."

There is a ton of news.

Top of the charts has to be the Toon's vault into the top half of the table thanks to a critical away win at Boro. Who, exactly, are these pretenders to the 2006 UEFA Cup? Can they possibly be as good as the inheritors of that fine predecessor to said chamionship, the 1969 Inter-City Fairs Cup? Evidently not! But no, this does not mean TDH will finally say something nice about Amoeba. TDH will only say that Roeder's doing well to win all the easier ones, even if he can't pull out any truly big results.


Today the Red Mist showed that at least one team can still disrupt The Goon Show's pretty triangles. TDH was almost fooled, but clearly Mr. Angry wasn't. Even with his hottest striker on the bench, Sir managed to stick a big monkey wrench in Le Voyeur's plans.

One must ask why those plans included leaving Terry Henry on the bench, with only a midweek tie at Pompey on the schedule. Perhaps The Goon Show are hoping to make it back into the Champions League via the Liverpool Rule (Rool?). And indeed, their Premier League performances haven't affected their European challenge so far.

El Roon demonstrated once again that he rises to the occasion in big matches, something that will surely warm the cockles of Sven's heart. Toure's lunge at Wine's early shot was clearly a handball; with fair play and a little luck, the Menace from Merseyside could have had a hat trick. Now if he could only sort out those 700,000 pounds of gambling debts....

It's been a good weekend all around for Manure, what with the AIG shirt deal coming through. Those who crowed over the loss of Vodafone will now have to consider whether the Glazers are crazy like the proverbial foxes. TDH notes that the hair of both species is the same color, at least among the Glazers who have some, which isn't many. (Whew, that was a lot of links for a bad joke.)

The Special One doesn't have to worry too much about the challenge from the Theater of Screams, though, if his defenders keep scoring three per match. The Billionaire Boys have certainly relied on goals from their back four from time to time, something one wouldn't expect given the money they've spent on the front six. Remember in mid-season, when JT won two matches all by himself? Well, let's just say it's probably not something they should count on for the future.


How, how, how did the FA manage to screw up Guus Hiddink's candidacy for England manager before it started? Fans will doubtlessly spend many hours and pints ruminating over this very question as Sam Allardyce leads The Most Boring England Squad Ever to defeat against Estonia and Andorra in the qualifiers for Euro 2008....


Finally, a bit of chatter from the Continent.

* Is there a single Spanish stadium outside the Camp Nou that's not populated by openly racist fans? Pichichi Eto'o again suffered abuse, this time at the Sardine Can. He answered in characteristic fashion with a well-taken strike, but really, that's no consolation. Those FIFA sanctions can't come fast enough for La Liga. It's a disgrace.

* Are the rotors coming off the Yellow Submarine's domestic campaign, in Goon Show fashion? Riquelme was left standing in amazement as his teammates bungled yet another free kick against Depor. Then he watched as Gonzalo Rodriguez muffed the simplest of passes for an easy goal. The man loves his football, and his sense of decency was clearly offended.

* Yes, Mara, Kaka is looking scary for Milan. TDH would bet he scores more goals in the World Cup than Ronaldo or Robinho. Any takers?


Blogger the Maradona of Malawi said...

TDH - even the Camp Nou fans aren't great - each year they ritually taunt roberto carlos, to the extent that earlier this season Eto'o threatened a walk out if they did it this year. not sure whether they did (they only had 20 minutes before he got sent off).

If UK rumours are true, then next year, Riquelme will be being exasperated by his partner in central midfield, John O'Shea while wearing the AIG.

And the whole milan team looked good in the second half. Inzaghi is clearly in better form than Gila, and Serginho will be very unlucky if he's dropped, even if Maldini is fit again. We now have to play Barca - it can go either way. But will be a superb tie.

7:14 AM  
Blogger The American Geordie said...

Riquelme at Manure? Surely, after Veron's experience, he'd be wary. Why would a slow finesse man want to play in England, anyway? Maybe he'll prove me wrong, but I doubt it. He'd need a ton of protection to work his magic, and I don't think the Red Mist can provide it these days. I've heard Real are interested, too.

Here's hoping the Barca-Milan tie is more entertaining than Barca-Chelsea. That one was a bit too sloppy and stultified for my taste.

Rijkaard played an incredibly offensive side at the weekend with Eto'o, Larsson, Giuly, Deco, Iniesta and Van Bommel. If he does it again with L'il Ron against a four-forward Milan team, it should be one for the ages.

8:13 PM  
Blogger the Maradona of Malawi said...

too true.

I remember a couple of seasons ago, we played Barca (i think it was barca) - one nil up in extra time, we won the ball and broke forward, and EVERYONE went up the pitch - even Billy Costacurta was in the final third. It was one of those moments that really gives the big f**k you to those critics (yes, you, Niall f**king Quinn) who lump Milan in the 'boring catenaccio' stereoptype.

If Xavi were fit, it would be gorgeous to watch two of the four best passers in the world (him and Pirlo) trying to dictate the game. If you're wondering, I have the other two as Xabi Alonso and Riquelme.

9:30 PM  
Blogger The American Geordie said...

Come on, L'il Ron doesn't make it into the best passer stakes? Just kidding, looks like we're really talking about midfield generals here. I'd say Nedved and Zidane at their best were equal to this group, but probably, alas, not anymore.

10:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No Nobby Solano in that group? Madness.

2:31 PM  

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