"He's not going to adhere himself to the fans..."

What, exactly, is Keano's problem?

True, this is not the first forum to contemplate such an important question. And yet, one must ask, why is the man shooting himself in the foot that's currently in his mouth despite his face?

It's one thing to say you're leaving approximately one full season before you plan to go. It's another to say that most of your younger teammates, members of what your manager calls the fourth squad he's built, aren't up to scratch.

Why is The Ire From Eire trying so hard to sabotage the season? Is he hoping to bring the gaffer down before he goes, perhaps to hasten his own installation in the job?

In fact, it's no sure thing that Keano will ever sit behind the bricks at Old Trafford. He's already infuriated the top management enough to cancel his chances forever - remember the prawn sandwiches? At the moment, Queiroz seems to have a lock on the job, anyway. And there's an open question as to whether Keano has any coaching aptitude at all. One can only shudder to think how many players would receive career-ending injuries... in training. (Souey, eat your heart out.)

Maybe Keano just harbors an intense desire to play for Gordon Strachan. That will surely be a match made in footie heaven: the poker-faced Ginger Joker and the man who would probably require a rectal exam with a feather duster to elicit a chuckle. Oh yes, and we all know what a great success it was the last time El Gordo signed a man named Keane....