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Tuesday, April 11, 2006

"As one door closes, another one shuts."

TDH is in a foul, foul mood. Yes, TDH has been reminded once again just what kind of muppets occupy the swish offices in Soho Square, whiling away the days as they dream of box seats at the World Cup final and Faria Alam's breasts. They are apparently so devoid of any diplomatic or negotiating skill that Guus Hiddink, who had to be in the top 2 or 3 picks to be the next England manager, would rather coach RUSSIA than deal with such idiots.

Yes, Russia. In the past several years, the team has had little to go on besides Mostovoi, Karpin and Smertin, two of whom are now over the hill and one of whom is darn close. Does Hiddink have some inside information that the team is set to become Vladimir Putin's pet project? Will the Dutchman, who's already salted away this season's Eredivisie championship, soon be taking home suitcases of crisp $100 bills and a few thousand shares of Gazprom? What could possibly have lured him?

It just seems far more likely that he threw up his hands at the absolute incompetence and incessant meddling of the FA, which, let's face it, can't even get a stadium built on time. TDH wishes Hiddink well in his new and presumably cushy post. Have some more caviar, Guus, yes, there's a good boy. (Pronunciation key: "Hev sam mur kevyar, Guus, yis, zayr's eh gud buoy.")


The long-awaited news seems finally to have come: Heinze is back. Mr. Angry wants to shore up his defense as he tries to skin seven points off the Billionaire Boys, and the Argentine is being rushed into service. If he's healthy, great news for La Seleccion. If not, he'll promptly be injured again, and Sir will have a good laugh as Heinze gets to rest for the whole summer. Pekerman must be boiling.

And speaking of La Seleccion, the variance of opinion here on who should play is simply staggering. In the England setup, there are maybe three spots up for grabs in the 23. Here, it could be a dozen. Obviously, whomever the coach picks, a lot of people will be unhappy. But the locals don't like to get their hopes up, so the anxiety fits the mood.


Blogger the Maradona of Malawi said...

you'll love them even more after this. I seem to recall reading in your absence that Martin O'Neill is qualified to coach England - but not Newcastle! He doesn't have the right badges!

9:02 PM  
Blogger The American Geordie said...

GAH! I think I'm having a coronary. (Or maybe it's just a Sir Bob skiing accident. Can't be sure.)

12:50 AM  

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